2003-09-12 - 8:36 a.m.
I was able to avoid the bulk of yesterday. I only lost it in the morning when I was sitting at home alone. And again in the afternoon hearing a Bruce Springsteen song. Thursday was much better than Tuesday Was.
Callie and I went on a hike yesterday morning. Three hours and four miles. During The Time. It was exactly right. I needed to be myself and Callie needed to be with me. Perfect. There's nothing like a smiling Sheltie and a forest/wetlands area to bring you back into yourself. For. A bit. It was good. Like our own prayer. Our promise to be In the World and to connect with it. I felt like I was sweating out the grief in a way. It felt like a massage might.
I liked the steady breathing we got into. The little rhythms. I sang her a Callie song while we walked. "You are a little dog, what are you thinking?" She didn't seem to be thinking anything other than trees, birds, smile, water, my girl. It was good. Very focused. Shelties are good at that. We kept hearing planes pass overhead. Everytime we did I'd tell her, "they're still flying Callie." Sometimes she would bark. That was good too.
I think I'm going to go hiking more.
It's a good way to feel your toes where they should be.
Last night we broke in the new deep fryer with a small impromptu Catfish Fry with three other couples. We made catfish, hushpuppies, coleslaw and white beans. A friend of ours brought a growler of Magic Hat and made an apple crisp for dessert.
I really love these people. I really love catfish.
It was a good night. That was good.
I woke up this morning to the news that Johnny Cash died. He always reminded me so much of my father. He was an incredible man, and an even more incredible musician. I know he and June are somewhere now singing for us.
Holding you in the light Johnny.
Blue Hills Reservation Ponkapoag Pond